Sherlimericks
by Alice Indigo Opal
Summary: A series of limericks inspired by Sherlock. Will be updated occasionally rather than frequently. Requests accepted and fulfilled happily. Don't expect much. Mild.
1. Jim's Competitor

**Notice: open to suggestions! Leave them in the reviews, PM me, send them off with a carrier pigeon, whatever. I am happy to hear what you have to say.**

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Jim knew a man that solved crimes,

An angel that walked in straight lines.

He played the Great Game

And swam in the fame.

Jim put an end to those times.


	2. White and Black

Holmes is a white-and-black man.

His eyes see all that they can.

He works very hard:

Saint Bart's, Scotland Yard.

He has a well-drawn-out plan.


	3. The King

The king in his palace is very alone.

It's rare that he leaves the seat of his throne.

To him, they're just pawns,

All except John.

Empathy to him he has shown.


	4. John's Friend Part II

Sherlock had never been very fond

Of people who tried to speak with him or bond.

John was his friend;

Now Sherlock's met his end.

His was a mysterious song.


	5. John's Friend Part I

John had a friend who was smart.

Although, he could be a bit tart.

He could crack any case,

Had a snow-white face.

And damn, it was so hard to part.


	6. Scars

He carries a cane and hobbles about.

If you cross him wrong, you'd better watch out.

He slams doors of cars,

You see not his scars.

He's waiting for Holmes, day in and day out.


	7. Bitterness in Beauty

He had a great view of London that day.

When he called his friend John, he had something to say.

He told him goodbye,

But of course, 'twas a lie.

Since then, the clouds have been grey.


	8. A Surgeon's Demons

John was a surgeon out East.

The war didn't bother him in the least.

In fact, the very ghost

That disturbed him the most

Was simply the Bakservillian Beast.


	9. Quiet Clouds

The clouds were dark and grey.

They simply watched, having nothing to say.

"Christ Jesus, why

Did you just let him die?"

He wailed as he was dragged away.


	10. An Unpleasant Surprise

John opened the fridge with a start.

There, run through with a dart:

A lonely human thumb-

It made him go numb.

An experiment with which he wishes to part.


	11. Reviewer Request: He's Mad

**Author's Note: This one goes out to the lovely Catsarepurple! If I might direct your attention to the chapter title, you'll notice the "Reviewer Request" I have included in it (it may be shortened to RR in the future). This means that someone either PM'd me or left a review suggesting topics.**

**Catsarepurple: Thank you so much for providing me with some fresh inspiration, my dear. It is slightly underdone, one might think, as you offered some specific quotes that I have yet to center a poem around. Here, I use the classic, "Oh, dull," which is one of my favourites. And you'll like the next few, I think. :D**

**In addition, it's refreshing to turn away from the somewhat dark and depressing path these have been going down lately. Thank you again, and let me know if there's anything else I can whip up for you in the future.**

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Some might just say that he's mad.

A scowl on his face, never glad.

He mutters, "Oh, dull,"

And talks to his skull.

He speaks grimly about fun to be had.


	12. RR: The Woman Part I

**This installment has been brought to you by the lovely Catsarepurple. Thank you, dear, for your suggestion.**

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The Woman, indeed, is a brilliant foe:

Admirable and in-the-know.

She says brainy is hot

And likes Sherlock a lot;

Sharp enough for a Vatican cameo.


	13. RR: The Woman Part II

**Another addition, thanks to Catsarepurple!**

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He possesses great powers of deduction.

Their relationship is under construction.

He's seen her nude,

But politeness is crude.

Yes, he also has powers of seduction.


	14. The Chemist

The flat's a perpetual mess.

Sherlock lives there, you can guess.

A chemist, he strives

To make use of lost lives

By experimenting with varying success.


	15. RR: Falling and Flying

**So I received a little note from the dear WholockedAnglophile requesting I write a Sherlimerick surrounding the tea party bit... I watched the scene around six times on YouTube, unregrettingly and unashamedly. Needless to say, I was greatly inspired by it.**

**These next few go out to you, WholockedAnglophile! Thank you for the suggestion!**

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They say that falling's like flying.

Whoever said that was lying.

In flying, there's cheer.

In falling, there's fear.

A permanent destination underlying.


	16. RR: A Man With a Key

**As requested by WholockedAnglophile, inspired by the tea party scene.**

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A man with a key is king.

He can break into anything.

The Tower of London,

Sherlock's mind-dungeon.

Just add another one to the ring.


	17. RR: Secrecy

**Just a bit more of the tea party scene, as requested by WholockedAnglophile.**

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There's no such thing as secrecy.

He owns that, too, don't you see?

Jim walked right in

And wore him thin;

Left Sherlock shaking like a tree.


	18. RR: I O U

**Another bolt of inspiration has stricken me, of and pertaining to WholockedAnglophile's Tea Party Scene request. She is to thank.**

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My darling Holmes, right now you stand tall.

But, dear Sherlock, if you might just recall:

A permanent destination,

A fateful demonstration.

Yes, honey, I owe you a fall.


	19. Here on this Bleak Day

**Animated by "The Great Game."**

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There was an explosion on Baker Street.

The cause of it was simply a gas leak.

Or that's what they say,

Here on this bleak day.

Yes, he must learn to be more discrete.


	20. Sherlock Talk

**The first all-dialogue Sherlimerick, narrated by Sherlock. Tricky metre this, and a little off, but good enough for now.**

**I welcome both your reviews and requests! I have a few pending suggestions that should be up soon, but I love feedback, even (ESPECIALLY) if it's criticism. I aspire to listen and respond, as it makes me a better author whether the comments I receive are harsh or kind.**

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"You know very well that I'm right.

Shut up now; I don't want to fight.

Thanks for stopping by,

But oh, how time flies.

As for escape, your chances are slight."


	21. Between-Season Woes Part I

The wait for Season Three

Is surely killing me!

Tumblr and FanFiction

And smut are my addictions;

I crave the return of 221B.


	22. Between-Season Woes Part II

**Oh, woe is me. Such a long time until Season Three.**

* * *

It's rude to make us wait,

But time we face our fate.

Absence abound

Season three, come round!

Long overdue, it's late.


End file.
